Avoiding the feeling of failure

In a previous post, I mused: “You’re not avoiding failure, you’re avoidng the feeling of failure.”

KL asks: "Can we unpack this into some actionable life hacks?"

When I was in 8th grade, I decided not to tryout for the middle school basketball team because I didn't think I'd make it and I didn’t want to get cut.

A couple of weeks later, I saw the group of guys that made the team. The best few were obviously better than me, but I would’ve been competitive, if not better, than the rest of the ones who made it.

By not trying out, I avoided the feeling of failure, but I got the same result: I didn't get to play on the team. I didn't avoid failure, I avoided the feeling of failure.

2025-12-11